Sunday, June 21, 2009

Fathers and daughters and sons

Happy fathers' day to all dads. To me fathers, day is bitter-sweet. I woke up this morning thinking about my dad, who was killed in an accident when I was only two years old. His passing left my mom with two little ones, my sister only six months of age. So I don't remember my dad and don't know much about how it feels to have one. I think of him and how hard it must have been to leave his two little girls and their mother.

Then I remembered my first husband, Doug, who became a dad at age 30 when our son Kevin was born. Doug was only a dad for a few short years because we lost Kevin to brain cancer at age nine. I don't see Doug much now. The last time was probably more than ten years ago. But I do know that he never had another child. So I'd like to think of him today. He adored his little boy.

And then there's Harry, the father of my second son Jamie, now almost 21. Harry has two sons, the older is Ben from a previous relationship, and we are blessed to be connected to both him and his mother. This morning we all got together at Harry's favorite coffee shop, the Cafe Fantastico, in Quadra Village to enjoy cups of their wonderful coffee and pastries. One dad, two moms, and two grown-up sons sharing some time together. In spite of losses, life is good.

The photo is of Harry with Ben and Jamie--all wearing goofy hats and feeling radical.

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